War

I’m at War

With my foolish  self

A war I’ve created

An abomination

Mind searches for absolute truth,

For All I feared has come upon me

All I’ve loved has long left me

A nuclear explosion within

Fancy a spectrum  of grays

Radiating into nonsensical actions

The chemistry over your intellectual psyche

Body emits radioactive fumes from

Decades of atomic words

Spilling  ashes on memory

Nostalgia bombs perimeters

I let go of bulletproof vest

As torpedo points at chest

Attempting to blast an empty core

I stand firm

 Battalion of men grenade my empire

Roaring  “There shall be War”

But,

You cannot annhilate the ruined

Nor what you cannot understand

It’s a clash of ruptured souls

The damned and the  fearless

It’s a War on war thing

© Viviana Plasman

Masochist

Brought the sun, hell and all that burns

To break the noose around my neck 

To unchain my undying soul

To rid me of delirium

Don’t you know? 

I want to choke 

And gasp till there's no air

Asphyxiate till every vein runs dry

And suffocate until every atom dies

Just to feel alive

On the verge of demise

You arrive

And breathe life into me

As if I asked

Saviour is it?

Breaking all laws

To destroy my façade

I detest you

Yet, you nurture

And lull me to slumber

I cock a pistol

Don’t you understand?

My delight

This whimsy of mine

Ache leads to oblivion

Pleasures my addiction

My tears aren’t in vain

In truth

What would become of me?

Without you

© Viviana Plasman

Savage

Eyes of a hunter

Sure of its prey

Obsessive gaze

With a cunning smile

I know your breed

Scars and open wounds

Bleeding existence

Into defiance

Shackled down to bitter howls

Demeaning my design

My wild heart in captivity

Rebelling against your drug

Domination and control

Is how you plan to tame

When my soul nature is to roam  

Full moon

Trances my hips

To the momentum of your pendulum

Rivaling my way

To the unknown chasm of man

Capture me today

For this instance

I’ll be your delight

Raveled under your spell

Inherently yours

But Release me tomorrow

Into borderless horizons

Lurking the depths of your dreams

Abyss of your desires

Haunting you still

Bloody cries in the wind

Forsaken your own will

My fate is to be free

Darling, you know

I’m just a wild thing

© Viviana Plasman

Breathless

Crows pecking at skin

Carcass tainted red

Feasting on love

Face now bone

Palpitating to oblivion

Trees reach out to grab me,

But I refuse,

I walk in thorns instead

Then, how am I to live?

 When I remain undone

Without reason

To the end of time I’d run

Sell my soul to Lucifer

Bleed verve away

The things I’d do

Just to faintly feel you again

Things you will never comprehend

© Viviana Plasman

Denied

Rape my being

Strip me with your glare

Decipher my blueprint

Shred me apart

I don’t care

I transform with time

Like nature,

Constant and ceaseless

Like space,

Filled yet indefinite

The depth of soul

Can never be destroyed

Only modified

And scribbled on

By each dying second

I may no longer wait for suns to rise

Or love to come

But of my existence,

My bearable past

 I am sure

I forever remain mystified

In absolute fascination

On how things

Could, Would, Should have been

With hope that in time

 I no longer deny my worth

© Viviana Plasman

Silence

This room I once knew now echoes with silence

Memories linger in this confinement

Outbursts of hatred and unspoken words

Empty faces I avoid

Muffled whispers over dinner plates

And soft footsteps across the floor

In the quiet,

My pulse fades

My body twitches,

as this fiend takes hold

can you sense the uproar?

In this wretchedness,

Selfish thoughts come alive

Fury fumes deep within

A bomb about to explode

I come out, despite the storm

This lightning about to strike me down

Can you hear the thunder of my soul?

Watch my rain pour!

© Viviana Plasman

Dementia

Like a virus, it takes hold

Creeps up from behind

Grasps me by the neck

Devours all sanity

Alters my state of mind

This beast I become

My universe collapses

The sky caves in

The moon cries

Stars vanish

Darkness consumes all light

Pain hits me,

Like a bullet to head

I fall into nothingness

Vulnerable and frail

I lie here,

I hold unto you

Embracing bittersweet memories,

But it’s time to let go

This pain burns the pits of my core

This agony I cannot ignore

The gods torment me

At every turn

Under midnight rain

You to mind

Your words like weapons

Tame the beast within

Capable of turning dark skies blue

There’s a halo above your head

Could it be your disguise?

Your axe about to strike my shield

I fall on my knees

I admit defeat

Your light,

Penetrates through my darkest nights

I attempt to conceal what’s inside,

For fear of the key you hold

The power to unchain my soul

The courage to release the unknown

I dread you

Then has madness become the essence of me?

© Viviana Plasman

Cliff

Church bells calling and daemons whispering malice in my ear

Cavity in my chest screaming where is your faith

Dark clouds approaching my sky

Clench for tempest

Misery beside me begging don’t leave

Should I leap and enjoy the ride

Even if I have to wait for my body to pummel down below

Or Should I turn back to a black and white world

Bloodshot eyes can’t bear no more

Gasping for air as I hinder my despair

These ghosts and voices haunt my mind

I’m single-handedly battling tragedy

As the blood in my veins turn bitter

I weep no more for my motives are filled with resent

As my reason amuses me I dread that it controls me

Sanity will not come and madness won’t depart

I stand on the edge I query existence

Watch me create myself as my turn is near

i'm at a cliff

I take a breath I calm myself

I must prove myself

I’m alive!

© Viviana Plasman